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10 Principles for Success and Inner Peace, life is beautiful, Principles for Success, success, Wayne Dyer
This is from work by
Wayne Dyer
Ten Principles for Success and Inner Peace
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The First Principle:
Have a Mind That Is Open to Everything and Attached to Nothing
The scriptures say, “With God all things are possible.”
Now tell me, what does that leave out?
There are billions and billions of planets, objects, and stars in our galaxy alone, and there are uncountable billions of galaxies out there. We are a specks in an incomprehensibly vast universe that has no end to it . . . how can anyone be a pessimist in a world where we know so little?
An open mind allows you to explore and create and grow. A closed mind seals off any such creative explanation. Remember that progress would be impossible if we always did things the way we always have. The ability to participate in miracles — true miracles in your life — happens when you open your mind to your limitless potential . . . refuse to allow yourself to have low expectations about what you’re capable of creating.
Understand that what you think about expands . . . If your thoughts are filled with doubt and you have a closed mind, you will of necessity act upon those closed-mindedness doubts, and you’ll see evidence of your thinking virtually everywhere you are. On the other hand, should you decide (make no mistake about this, it is a choice) to have a mind that’s open to everything, then you’ll act upon that inner energy, and you’ll be the creator of as well as the recipient of miracles wherever you are.
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The Wayne Dyer videos that I had put into this and the other posts from this series were removed from YouTube – I am doing my best to replace them when I find suitable substitutes.
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From early childhood we have been conditioned to accept the world the way our parents, teachers, friends and culture tell us it is and this conditioning may make it hard for us to keep an open mind that’s not attached to the achievement of culturally accepted outcomes.
It’s possible to have a burning desire yet not have attachments. You can have an inner vision of what you intend to manifest and still detach yourself from the outcome . . . When you detach from the outcome, you’re at peace; and you’ll ultimately see the fruits of your convictions . . . Simply have a mind that is open to everything but attached to nothing. Let it all come and go as it will. Enjoy it all, but never make your happiness or success dependent on an attachment to any thing, any place, and particularly, any person.
In all of your relationships, if you can love someone enough to allow them to be exactly what they choose to be without any expectations or attachments from you, you’ll know true peace in your lifetime. True love means you love a person for what they are, not for what you think they should be. This is an open mind and an absence of attachment.
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The above work is by
Wayne Dyer
Ten Principles for Success and Inner Peace
see also:
Success Principles
#2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, and #10
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Just e-mail me at thehunt4truth@yahoo.com
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Importance of Detachment
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But how can you love without attachments? of your mind, your soul, your thoughts? I get unconditional love where acceptance equates freedom, but loving means giving of yourself and if love isn’t fed it dies. I could be misunderstand that last few paragraphs. W
Great comment! Actually, I felt very hesitant about posting this. I stuck with Dr Dyers text and the video – but – I agree the no attachment really needs more explaining.
Related to attachment, I’m sure he means unhealthy fear-based clutching and controlling and bickering… or even worse sometime may occur within relationships.
He says about fear attachment:
“Perhaps the greatest lessons of my life have revolved around the slogan of the recovery movement: “Let Go and Let God”—a notion that involves relinquishing ego’s attachment to, or fear of, something. The single most pronounced attachment for most of us during the morning of our lives is the attachment to being right! There’s nothing ego loves more than to be right, which makes it an important and satisfying attachment to practice letting go of.
I seriously doubt that there’s anyone reading this who hasn’t engaged in arguing about trivial matters that turned into disagreements, which had a net effect of following a road of self-righteous anger. And all of it probably seemed to be for no reason other than the need, the desire, to be right! Eventually we may look back with wistful amusement, realizing now that our fear of actually being wrong was so strong then that another person’s opinion could energize this unwanted feeling. Ego’s strategy was to be right no matter what, a highly successful maneuver that effectively distracted us from genuine purpose. Letting go of an attachment to being right can be a fairly simple exercise.
So how can you choose to let go and let God, in a quest to eliminate an attachment to being right? You can handle it with these simple words spoken to another—You’re right about that. It stems from a soulful decision you make that when given the choice between being right and being kind—you’ll always choose to be kind. Saying “you’re right about that” will gradually open the entry point to a road that leads through letting go and letting God to experiencing a more significant life.
Part of the meaning we gain by letting go is a movement toward real contentment. Most stress in our lives results from hanging on to beliefs that keep us striving for more, because ego stubbornly believes we need it. When we make the shift away from attachment, the influence of our ego fades. We replace attachment with contentment. Chasing and striving—and then becoming attached to what we chased after—is a source of anxiety that feeds Ambition, but it won’t satisfy the need for Meaning at our soul level.” source: http://www.drwaynedyer.com/blog/letting-go
His guiding principle is “We replace attachment with contentment.” In my teaching, I’d say that with family, we want to be able to evolve to have true (holy) love – that when one partner is using the relationship, this isn’t impossible — so, that means that the other partner must learn to chastise and yet be tolerant of faults as well as enrolling with mentors or support systems to improve their own spiritual program. When there is one partner with immaturity or addictions or emotional or mental health issues, this is a huge burden for a family — more than a family handles it challenge — generally both partners and even the children need help. IT IS DIFFICULT; to say the least, but we must allow others to grow and growth of spirituality takes time and commitment, as you know.
With healthy partners, most situations can be worked out, perhaps with use of friends. I think everyone must have several healthy spiritually fit friends… and having a mentor is good to boot.
Aside from what Dr Dyer says in the book / video (Ten Principles for Success and Inner Peace), he says elsewhere on love (attachment):
“Think of your relationships in terms of holy or unholy. Holy relationships facilitate the power of intention at a high energy level for everyone involved. Unholy relationships keep the energy at the lower, slower levels for all concerned. You’ll know your own potential for greatness when you start seeing the perfection in all relationships. When you recognize others’ holiness, you’ll treat them as divine expressions of the power of intention, wanting nothing from them. The irony is that they become co-creators manifesting all your desires. Want nothing from them, demand nothing from them, have no expectations for them, and they’ll return this kindness. Demand from them, insist that they please you, judge them as inferior, and see them as servants, and you’ll receive the same. It is in your best interest to be acutely aware of what you truly want for others, and to know whether you’re in a holy or an unholy relationship with every person you’re involved with.
One truth I’ve recognized during the years of my own growth is that it’s impossible to know my perfection if I’m unable to see and honor that same perfection in others. The ability to see yourself as an expression of intention and to see yourself in all of humanity is a characteristic of the holy relationship. It’s the ability to celebrate and honor in all others, the place where we’re all one.” source: http://www.drwaynedyer.com/blog/holy-relationships
Another source I have is this PDF on Love Without Attachment: http://static.squarespace.com/static/50aff114e4b054abacd31e0a/t/5288d486e4b0a1b235b3ae91/1384699014174/2013-09-20-can-you-love-without-attachment.pdf
I do my best when presenting teaching from a master, to not put in too much of my own wording.
THANKS FOR THE COMMENT! What a blessing you are to me.
I hope this was helpful.
~ Eric
Pretty comprehensive summary. thxs for the effort. W
The attachments that Dr Dyer is referring are about fear and dependency, and have more to do with love of self than love of another. Love without attachment is by his teachings a purest love.
You can disagree… people usually disagree. In some of my classes, the students would squirm and be disagreeing and tell me about the horrors of relationships sometime in their past.
I can see love without attachment for acquaintances, your fellowmen; but at a closer level I just got to have some give and take:)
Love is like a flower, it needs sunshine, attention, water, talk to it, irrigate the root, mulch it or else it dies. If you love a flower by looking at it every day and saying I love you without no corresponding action, that sucker is going to die pretty soon.W
LOL – you’ve got a point there. 🙂
Not arguing for argument sake, but in my humble opinion, I feel that love is deep within a person; it creates contractions when you’re not pregnant; it shakes the heart like an earthquake; it makes you dizzy when you aren’t sick. Gosh that ought to take something out of you and be returned as well. W
I do agree … the ideal is that lovers would mature together and grow spiritually together … this is the Sacramental Principle of marriage. Ideally we strive to form with a partner this mystery in Christ our Lord abundantly blessing this love.
Dr Dyer’s addressing open mindedness more so in this principle of his. He is warning about our tendencies to look for what is offending about someone; thoughts born of anger, judgment and fear are habitual memes that fill our heads if we let them. He uses the word memes in some of his writing; memes being cultural behaviors and attitudes that we unconsciously imitate and repeat.
At 5:40 in the video, he mentions a test for martial relationships: test myself I am to try these about myself when thinking about my spouse; 1) “I am not really attached to you at all. I am merely deluding myself into the belief that without you I will not be happy.” 2) “I leave you free to be yourself, to think your thoughts, indulge your tastes, follow your inclinations, behave in ways that you decide are to your liking.”
He goes on to the end of this segment demonstrating that a reason that relationships would fail is that we’d turn to our needs to cease any behaviors that are perceived as offending; abandoning allowing and instead putting conditions upon the relationship – looking for fulfillment from the partner but now if they will change. He says, “We tell ourselves that if this person behaves in a way that I find offensive then I can’t be happy.”
This is exactly what keeps the largest number of failing marriages in the area of failing. The two begin to place demands upon the other – for example, one has standards and the other has failings but that one that has failings blames the standards that are inconsistent… and it goes on and on ever building a little more and more the reasons to look for what is offending – rarely anymore then are these two able to enjoy each other.
Non-attachment is a teaching that originates in Eastern philosophies. In Western culture, we value attachment and by its definition, that is fine, I think. Attachment: a feeling that binds one to a person, thing, cause, ideal, or the like; devotion; regard: a fond attachment to his cousin; a profound attachment to the cause of peace. Applying this to marriage, we say we have a legal or religious attachment in marriage. We took vows and those vows are essential to maintaining the attachment by the conditions of the marriage agreement. I think Dyer isn’t addressing that specifically when he’s referring to attachment as something that he warns against. He is in this use linking attachment to unhealthy co-dependence.
Thanks for keeping this discussion alive to get to the root of this meaning.
~ Eric
not a problem. thxs for digging deep. W
I have the book and read it all the time. I just love Wayne Dyer!
Reblogged this on hopeandloveradio.